The following are the notable posts I’ve produced for the Microsoft Developer twitter channel. Barring service halts, the #DevHumor series is run weekly and composed by myself with a small group of developers serving as a sounding board. The two best performing messages below were one-off participation in trending memes. Owing to Microsoft having a more staid, corporate demeanor, participation in memes typically has required multiple levels of approvals making timely participation challenging.
Coworker – "Hey, new glasses! They look good."
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) November 15, 2018
Me – "Thanks…"
My brain –
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
Me – “…THEY HELP ME C#.”
Marvel: "Infinity War is the most ambitious crossover event in history."
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) March 20, 2018
Us: pic.twitter.com/2Cmxbikzy9
.cow {
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) July 20, 2018
height: 100%;
width: 200%;
z-index: -1;
position: relative;
}
.building {
width: 100%;
margin-left: 100%;
}
/* #DevHumor */ pic.twitter.com/ngcW3T651V
We would like to apologize for the lack of indentation in our #DevHumor post this week. We are currently looking for the misplaced spaces and will letyou know if we find them.
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) June 1, 2018
It's good to make sure your container has CPU limits, otherwise the container could get away from you. #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/VFkbQYHgIp
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) August 3, 2018
private void superbOwl()
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) February 2, 2018
{ for (int ii = 359; ii >= 0; ii–)
{
rotateHeadToDegree(ii);
if (ii == 0) {
ii = 359;
}
}
}
// #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/y2xRRCDZUx
.dog {
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) April 20, 2018
transition: height 1s;
}
/* #DevHumor */ pic.twitter.com/dTiK5Wqm0Z
Sometimes, debugging can feel like this… #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/9hXLqqB1TV
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) July 27, 2018
Always remember to accurately size variables and arrays or else unexpected results may occur.#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/sdfZsF6HKM
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) June 15, 2018
Ah, yes, the first time we wrote a multi-threaded process… We remember it well.#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/4VXmGT7PTP
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) June 22, 2018
do {
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) September 7, 2018
pingHost();
} while (!checkResponse());
// #devhumor pic.twitter.com/d0kyQKbQvy
Load balancing? You could say we're the…
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) May 25, 2018
(•_•)
( •_•)>⌐■-■
(⌐■_■)
…. 🐐Greatest of All Time🐐#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/Rdl7Jbnw5l
breath.Stop();
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) February 9, 2018
try
{
Parallel.ForEach(fhvy, bster => Land(bster));
mood = "😲";
}
catch
{
mood = "😞";
}
breath.Restart();
// #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/ccLwaLnp4j
while (cookieTemp > perfect)
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) August 31, 2018
{
dog.Head.visible = true;
Console.WriteLine("Can I have one yet?");
refreshCookieTemp();
}
// #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/AWGrdNmXuh
#DevHumor
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) January 25, 2019
When you finally find that Stack Overflow example that solves your exact problem: pic.twitter.com/OSuFhaYdwP
while (CanSeeBall() && NotHaveBall())
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) October 26, 2018
{
ReachForBall();
}#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/X8pooa3aT8
Us, when we forget to attach a Click handler on our Button and are trying a quick test run.#click #clickclick
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) February 8, 2019
#clickclickclick #click#clickclickclickclickclick #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/qwYRlSyPaY
10 GOTO 20
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) January 5, 2018
20 GOTO 10
A Visual Representation.#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/3AGZg0wIiV
SCENE: Morning Stand-up
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) January 26, 2018
Boss: Did you hit any blocking issues fixing the bug?
Dev: Well…#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/kEc8xGzq3I
When you make a mistake in your code, but it turns out better than the spec. #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/fXVe19mVko
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) August 10, 2018
document.getElementById("cat0").onchange = function() {catChange()};
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) March 23, 2018
function catChange() {
document.getElementById("cat1").value = document.getElementById("cat0").value;
}
// #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/LWoCN3ZO8p
try
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) April 13, 2018
{
Array.Resize(ref myPillows, myPillows.Length + cat);
}
catch (FileLoadException e)
{
Cat.Mood("confused");
}
// #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/4dpd9SiHGA
"Hey boss…. are you sure we have the load balancing set up right?"
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) November 30, 2018
"Why do you ask?"
"Oh….. No reason…."#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/ByJyd1KqfQ
C:Users#DevHumor>ftp
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) September 28, 2018
ftp> open panda
Connected to panda.
User (panda:(none)): anonymous
331 Please specify the password.
Password:
230 Login successful.
ftp> get ball
200 PORT command successful.
426 Connection closed; transfer aborted. pic.twitter.com/wwVxsm30QN
#if DEBUG
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) April 6, 2018
set loglevel=minimal;
//#elif PROD
set loglevel=full;#endif
// #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/lsFrKneZ44
Notes from the #DevHumor coding guide:
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) March 1, 2019
When programming your deadlock detector, ensure it recovers the deadlock state and doesn't just cover it up. pic.twitter.com/NCxgarqGIS
document.cookie("cookieNum=" + count);
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) February 23, 2018
var user = getCookie("user");
if (user == "CookieMonster") {
while(count > -1) {
count–;
document.cookie("cookieNum=" + count);
}
// #DevHumor (c/o https://t.co/KOxDBD50U4) pic.twitter.com/M2jJtURBRg
public Doll nestingDoll(Doll newDoll)
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) May 4, 2018
{
return nestingDoll(new Doll(newDoll–));
}
// #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/ojsPwpD72t
c:> cd #devhumorunused
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) March 9, 2018
c:#devhumorunused> dir /b
rock.out
c:#devhumorunused> cat rock.out pic.twitter.com/YZU0KRshm5
That "just set my vacation out-of-office" feeling when the feature requests start coming in for your team.#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/Lwwd5gLN9q
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) November 2, 2018
Us, trying to ingest all of the delicious learning from #MSBuild, a story told through #DevHumor, a cat, and a gif: pic.twitter.com/Q06YzgR6KZ
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) May 11, 2018
git –push hippo HEAD#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/CNyi6IXbUw
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) June 8, 2018
Debugging in the days before IntelliSense….#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/ITEHpFFYkj
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) July 6, 2018
Problem Report (#DevHumor edition)
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) December 15, 2018
Summary: do-while loop condition issue.
Expected Result: 🐈🐈🐈
Actual Result: pic.twitter.com/bJYL7BFknE
Random rnd = new Random();
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) January 12, 2018
int fun = https://t.co/WIYNnNpf00();
if (fun % 2 == 0)
{
int x = fun / 0;
}
// #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/5qOvyBBcXa
Scene: #DevHumor Office, Friday, 4:35 PM
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) February 22, 2019
Manager: I know it's late, but, Sales needs a weekend voluntee-
Entire office: pic.twitter.com/59XCFIymf4
#DevHumor
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) September 14, 2018
[scene: a job interview]
Them: And we need to make sure our new dev is really Agile.
Us: pic.twitter.com/i1sJ31CqtU
Them: Good news: We found the deployment issue.
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) January 18, 2019
Us (the #DevHumor team): Yay!
Them: Bad news: You need to actually apply the fix in the data center.
Us: pic.twitter.com/jw8iTPPpSA
foreach (Aves myOwl in myParliament)
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) February 1, 2019
{
var superbOwl = new Thread(this.HootHoot, myOwl);
superbOwl.start();
}
// #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/teXipEp4Ef
#DevHumor Time Management Tip #5: If you can't see anyone in the meeting room, the meeting must have been cancelled. pic.twitter.com/jVH1NAkPzM
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) March 29, 2019
Us: Closing out the pending #DevHumor work items prior to end-of-year break.
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) December 21, 2018
Newly discovered bug: pic.twitter.com/WcSMiyieMh
In which we raise the age-old programming debate…#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/nI404URXmp
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) February 16, 2018
A wintry visualization of a conversation in the #DevHumor team channel:
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) February 15, 2019
"Hey, I finished my sprint work. Anyone have any bugs they need help with?" pic.twitter.com/7a8XRpZWMB
When our internal compiler returns true for
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) October 12, 2018
if (https://t.co/MEiNdVA5RY.ToString("dddd") == "Friday" &&
https://t.co/0Kcd5ZrnM1.ToString("hh") == "17")#OutTheDoorForTheWeekend#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/czbJmCgh37
When your quickly written emergency fix works and tests flawlessly, in GIF form.#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/2aKEEljG6n
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) October 5, 2018
In preparation for #InternationalDogDay (coming up on the 26th), we wanted to share this helpful reminder that when merging sorted arrays, keep good track of the indexing… #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/TpNdNUWG8L
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) August 24, 2018
.puppy {
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) November 9, 2018
background-position: 50% 125%;
}
/* #DevHumor */ pic.twitter.com/E6k42bcSys
When it's lunch hour and you need that one last code review, but you're the last one in the office….#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/ndXnGZD5dl
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) November 16, 2018
"That launch was #epic. This will be a well deserved rest."
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) April 27, 2018
Alert: Feature Request
Alert: Feature Request
Alert: Feature Request
Aler…#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/VjcvP2vOlt
Observed Response Time: 690ms
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) August 17, 2018
Response Time-out Threshold: 700ms
🤜🤛#DevHumor pic.twitter.com/0OL7QLoX40
#DevHumor, #MSIgnite edition:
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) September 21, 2018
Boss: Hey, you ready for Ignite?
Us: pic.twitter.com/OJ5L7iv44Y
The feeling when you’re racing your friend and your code compiles first… #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/bfMVezKYzG
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) January 19, 2018
When we said "Let's make the tables on the site be yellow," we more meant something like:
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) March 30, 2018
table {
background-color: #fffacd;
}
/* #DevHumor */ pic.twitter.com/zj7Q3E3PFg
SELECT STUFF('emptymouth', 1, 5, 'acorn');
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) June 29, 2018
GO
— #DevHumor pic.twitter.com/DFaq8ZVOzb
(#DevHumor'ing while tutoring)
— Microsoft Developer (@msdev) October 19, 2018
–So, linters clean up code stylistically?
"Yes. I wonder what that feels like to the code…"
–Wait, what?
"What? Nothing."
thinking: pic.twitter.com/s0Poye3qty